adickers

We finally got a passing grade at the doctor's office -- hooray!!! Evelyn weighed in today at a whopping 8 lbs 12 oz and got the stamp of approval from Dr. G. Now I just have to continue nursing, bottle, and pumping at every feeding... hmmm... ;)

Anyway, the little angel has just awoken from her nap. Better run. Speaking of angels, hsst is an angel in disguise. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your support today!

I am astounded at the profound change that takes place when you have a baby. The first week was pure euphoria and adrenaline. But when that wore off, I had to come to terms with the idea that NOTHING will ever be the same... (I may be exaggerating - but I don't really know, because I've never done this before.) I finally feel like I may be getting the "mommy" thing and the "parent/spouse" thing down, but it's hard to reconcile these selves with my old life.

As a mommy, I try to sleep when she sleeps, do laundry (oh, the laundry!), read parenting and healthcare books, sing to her, rock her, play with her, and of course feed her. And we've gone out a couple times to different mommy type events (breastfeeding support group, pediatrician, grandma's house). As a parent/spouse, Adam and I are in constant contact about how much she sleeps, eats, poops, pees, "smiles," generally looks adorable, how much I've eaten and whether I'm taking care of myself, how many visitors we have planned, what we need from Babies R Us, etc.

And then there are times that *seem* normal -- for example, eating dinner and watching TV while she sleeps. But we also know we've got a long night ahead that we need to prep for, and at any given time if she is fussing or hungry (which is often) everything else needs to be put on the back burner. I find that in reporting about my day, I now speak in terms of "we"...

I know at some point there will be a new normal that will include parts of my "old" life (going out to dinner, spending time with my husband *not* talking about the baby (and not feeling guilty about that!), jaunting off to the store to do some shopping). Right now, though, I feel a real loss of identity at times ("Amy" has not been associated with "mommy" in any way in the past). I have never done so much growing in such a short period of time before, and it's HARD!

The last few days our baby girl has not been feeling well. I cannot believe how much it tears at my heartstrings to hear her cry and know she hurts and not be able to help... I know we are doing the best we know how by her, but I worry that we're messing up. I hope to see her happy and healthy again soon. Since she is so brand new it's especially hard -- 3 days of being sick is almost 1/5th of her life! The doctors say she appears to be getting better, but sadly she's not there yet. Poor thing.

Well, that's the update. Thanks for "listening"! I think we'll try to go for a walk this afternoon and enjoy this beautiful late summer day :)

Saturday morning is very sweet with both Adam and Evelyn. I have no idea what I would do without my wonderful, supportive husband right now. I sure feel lucky to have him at my side, and I have to say -- we make a pretty good team :)

Off to try to shower before the little one wakes up!

I may have been stoic through 9 months of a working pregnancy and 12 hours of unmedicated labor, but this morning the tears started flowing as Adam headed back to work...

This last week has been so magical, it's hard to let go. I know life will return to a new normal, which will include our beautiful daughter, but I'm not ready yet. Luckily, Adam is strong and supportive and has a great job to go back to, all of which help. Hopefully the first day is the hardest. (Can you imagine what a mess I'm going to be when *I* have to go back to work, or on Evelyn's first day of kindergarten?!? Yeesh.) I hope Adam doesn't read this post at work, because I don't want to make him sad. Just had to let it out a bit.

I hear the little one starting to stir. Her big bright eyes may be just the thing I need right now. Please don't worry about me -- I'm just sad is all, and I think that's to be expected. I know Evelyn and I are going to have a great time together, and I look forward to our evenings together as a little family :)

For one brief moment yesterday, I entertained the idea of faking labor pains to get out of a really boring meeting... which made me smile discretely to myself, and made the meeting more bearable :)

Wish me luck today as I barrel into pages and pages of depositions, briefs, and cases to try to wrap up a major work project. Ah, summer Sundays (hmmmm, this doesn't seem like what a July weekend is supposed to be....) Hopefully the last time I'll be working this hard in my "off" time for awhile! We also have our second Hypnobirthing class this afternoon, so that should be a welcome break.

In cleaning out the "nursery," I've found a few boxes of old notes and letters. I feel very blessed to have had such supportive, fun friends over the years :)

That said, I think I am going to forbid my daughter from ever becoming a junior high girl -- they are too mean! I guess today's generation won't really have the opportunity to stroll down memory lane, since all of their communications are by text messages. Their loss! (especially the *very* artistic drawings and decorations on a lot of the notes... man, what talent!)

Super Lawyer day did not really go as planned. Alas. (More like Slow & Steady Lawyer keeps going...) I just hope to keep my head in the game and my nose to the grindstone (hmmm... interesting image) while letting my focus begin to shift to the much more important things that are taking shape at home over the next 3 months :)

It would be really nice to have one good, solid, productive day at work today. Ought to be possible, no? Sometimes it seems like the kind of thing where the more you want it, the more it slips through your fingers... I will imagine today that I am Super Lawyer. Perhaps a drawing would help (I'm picturing a power suit with a cape; maybe a Laptop of Justice). Yes - that will be me today :)

Officially entering the third trimester - hooray! I am sure the summer is going to fly by, and I am thrilled and anxious for the life changes awaiting us in the fall. We moved bookcases and desks today out of my office to being making it a nursery. Very cool. (and I'm proud of us for our hard work)

It's so nice to have a chance to get things done (we also caulked the bathroom last night, which is a chore we've been putting off for about a year...) I had a great weekend with my family at Klinger Lake, and am glad to have come home early to spend time with my husband. Time apart and time together are both very special to me. I am content and rested. A nice time to lay low and think about the future. I am also very excited to be welcoming Quinn's little brother in the upcoming weeks :) Amazing the changes that come about so seemingly suddenly -- even when you have known about them for months!

I know a lot of you had a chance to get to know and love my grandfather, Lucius Cole. I am sad to pass along the news that Bapa passed away on Saturday, Mar. 14th. The medical staff told us the end was near, and many of our family members had the opportunity to sit with Bapa, hold his hand, and tell him how much we love him. After my Grandma finally went to bed for the night, my aunt was holding Bapa's hand when he took his last breath. I thought these last days would be sad and painful, but everything was about as peaceful as you can hope -- and it was also clear that it was time to let him go. We will miss him more than words can say.

arettber and I are excited to officially announce: WE ARE EXPECTING A BABY IN SEPTEMBER!



Interpretive guidance:
#1 - heartrate and photo of head & shoulders
#2 - head and shoulders
#3 - chin, torso, and left leg
(so far, looks like our baby has a strong heart, a big brain, and is contemplative in nature...)

We found out right after Christmas (although it took us a few weeks to believe this was for real). I am currently 11 weeks along and feeling pretty good! More postings in the near future, I promise, as I get used to the idea of talking about this publicly. :)

Today, I am wearing bright red, knee-high, waterproof, London Fog boots.
I purchased them at 8:00 last night.

Slush puddles 8" deep? Ain't no thang.
;)

I forgot that they turn the heat off in my office on federal holidays. Brrrrr!!!
(that's what I get for coming in to work)

Having grown up with messages geared towards color-blindness (along the lines of "you should consider an individual's merits and not his or her race"), I am deeply humbled by my own ignorance in failing to recognize just what it would mean to so many that our country has elected a black man to its highest office. I am blown away by the power of this moment.

After a long, long day on Sunday, I got home and realized I still had to do one more day of cardio or weights to meet the Ab Challenge goal of 5 days a week (weeks start on Mondays, and I had only done 4 days...). I decided I was not going to do it -- BUT I also decided that the Ab Challenge is not so much about perfection as it is about not giving up.

So, technically, I have lost the Ab Challenge. But last night I got out the weights and did a full set of reps, then added an impromptu dance party (N'Sync and Venga Boys) for a bit of cardio and general well being. I'm still going to aim for 5 days a week, but I'm not going to let last week get me down. I'm still really proud of myself :)

Heard on my Burlington Northern train last night, through the soft, soothing tones of the PA system:

"This train is operating approximately one... hundred... and... twenty... minutes... and... zero... zero...seconds behind schedule. We apologize if this causes any inconvenience..."

Everyone on my car broke out in bitter laughter.
Don't worry, I eventually got home about 3 hours after I left the office. Sigh.

Up past midnight the last four nights, up again at 5:30 a.m. today...
Man, am I glad I don't usually keep these hours!

Procrastination is bound to catch up to us all some day. Hopefully I can learn from this experience ;) Back to the grindstone I go!

I'm working from home today, because the only way I could figure to get over the current "hump" I'm facing at work (deadline looming!) is to pretend it's exam time, hole up in front of my computer in my sweats, and stick at it for as long as it takes...

Unfortunately, with that mandate, I'm a little less than excited to get started. Wish me luck!

Anyone know how tipping is supposed to work at a hair salon??? Do you tip the shampoo girl and the stylist? If so, how much to each? Last time I got my hair cut, the person behind the counter told me the stylist usually gives the shampoo girl a cut of the tips.

Just curious... Maybe I should write Miss Manners :)